Be a Jerk !! - a step by step guide.

Step1: Picking up chicks

Top pick up line doing the rounds
"I want to adopt a baby"
Disclaimer: to be used with caution when you are picking up chicks at baby showers and bar mitzvahs.

Step 2: The line works. And oh yeah, the chick falls for your hunky looks and in a blink of an eye decides you are the one she's been waiting for all this while. And since you are cool n hunky, save that chivalry, and let the girl take you to her home.

She tells you "This is my first time, tell me if I am not doing anything RIGHT"
You tell her, "Do you have cable? They have some great instructional videos for $9.99"

Note: Prices may vary. Check with your local service provider if you are a nice jerk. Else, who cares? Its showing up on her bills.

Step 3: And when you are turning the corner of 69th and Pleasureville

..if you dont have latex on you and if you cant step out in your boxers and find a CVS or a Duane Reed, have your best straight face and go "Sweetheart, I promise I wont come"

Step 4: "Ooops! thats awrite babe, we will adopt the second one"